Settling Back and It’s ok

When my brother was working on his thesis, it was almost taboo to ask him anything like, “Are you almost done?”  Or “When do you think you’re going to graduate?”

He eventually finished, and graduated just fine, without our help of asking him that dreaded question every time we spoke to him.

It’s no secret we’ve been trying to sell this house on and off for the past 3 years.  Everyone that sees me, the first thing they ask is “How’s the house coming?”

Um…

And I find myself rolling into that loop again of “I wish it would sell soon because I need to do this/do that and I can’t till it sells!!!”

I’ve been catching myself, talking to friends, hearing what I’m saying and then I sit back inside myself thinking, “Wait a minute!  When have I heard myself saying all these things before?  Oh!  Yesterday!”

Boring.

And while all the above may be true, very recently I’ve had a bit of a breakthrough and am starting to relax a bit about it all.  What if it doesn’t sell this time?  What am I gonna do?  What can I do?  How can I maximize my time here, if I’m not going anywhere for awhile.  If it’s true what they say, that we’re all where we need to be for a reason, what’s mine?

R and I just finished my new CD that we’ve been working on, here.  We competed the mastering, which was the last step, yesterday.

All my technology here is set up and wired perfectly here, so I’ve started spending time everyday getting to know it better.

I’m finishing up a couple of major writing projects that I’ve been working on for the past two years, while I still know where every piece of paper and reference material lives in this house.

So maybe now that I’m getting comfortable, maybe it will sell.

Maybe it won’t.

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